Joey's Story

[Carly]

Hi Everyone, My name is Carly I found this great website through the facebook group and think that it is great. I have a 3 year old son Joey who is hearing impaired, Joey had meningites at 3 weeks old. Joey's hearing loss was not diagnosed until after his first birthday after I went back and forth with the doctors begging them to please do a hearing test especially since I would shake a rattle in Joey's ear and get no reaction; the doctors kept tellinng me that he was fine and maybe just a little developmentally behind do to the meningites. Finally after Joey's 1st birthday they did an ABR and determined that Joey had a mild to moderate loss in his left ear and moderate to severe in his right. Joey got his hearing aids shortly after that point and we continue to struggle with him daily to wear them, he is doing very well communicating and has a teacher with the deaf and hard of hearing through the school district that comes to our house once a week. We continue to be very pleased with Joey's progress but also know that it is going to continue to be a very long journey for the whole family.

[Tami Hossler]

Deb,
I am applauding you for learning ASL!!!!!! Embracing your son's visual language is so so important. Research also shows that children who have a solid foundation in their primary language can do better with spoken language "if" the child has the potential or the motivation. They also do better cognitively and academically in English literacy.
Erica is profoundly Deaf. She was raised bilingually. ASL is her primary language and English (reading and writing) is her second language. She had speech training early on, but it really wasn't her strength or desire. She passed all the state testings in Indiana on her first try that all the hearing kids in public school have to take. She passed the ISTEP graduation exam that is required in order to get a high school diploma in the state of Indiana as well. I believe this happened not because she is overly intelligent, but because she had access to language, communication, and fluent language model teachers and peers throughout her school years. Just like hearing kids have in public school. A very normal childhood with a variety of social opportunities with a critical mass of peers also contributed to her overall growth and development.
Like Beth's daughter, Erica too flows wonderfully in and out of both worlds. Bilingualism is such a wonderfully inclusive environment:)

[Beth Donofrio]

Just my "two cents"....my daughter, I consider her bilingual.....she speaks so well but she is also fluent in ASL....she can flow effortlessly into each world....now the deaf world is easier for her because she doesn't have to struggle to lipread and listen so hard and watch for visual cues....but she does flow inbetween both worlds so well....every kid is different though and will have different experiences.

[DebCny]

Tami -
You are right. Every child is different. That is the thing I'm learning about hearing loss - no two stories or kids have the exact same experience. If my son wasn't doing so well with the HA's, and in school in general - we would have also explored other options earlier on. I'm actually trying to learn ASL now... and my son hopes to learn it next year in school.

I'm curious if Erica's hearing loss was also "mild" or more severe? When we first learned of our son's hearing loss - "they" made it sound like it was "just a mild loss" so, we never even considered ASL or had it mentioned to us as an option. I now wish we would have explored more options earlier - just to give AC the options and benefits of both worlds.

debcny
http://hearmehearmenot.wordpress.com

[Tami Hossler]

Carly,
When Erica was that age she had HA too. But once she entered 3rd grade, she didn't want anything to do with them. By that age, we followed her lead. She hasn't worn them since and has never missed them. She gets along just fine without them and hearing is not what she is about. ASL is her language. That is her experience. Not everyone is the same.
Before that age, I would recommend that you check with the audiologist to be sure that the HA input is not too much or too little for Carly which might be causing him not to want them in. Or it could be that they are uncomfortable too.

[Carly]

Hi Deb, That is a really good idea; Joey just loves spiderman and we go next week to get new earmolds. HHMMM!!! I might have to borrow that idea from you:)

[DebCny]

Carly -
Oh yeah... and when AC was little.. he loved Spiderman... so, we use to call his HA's, his "Spiderman ears" - and he had the molds done in blue and red. He thought they made him hear like Spiderman... =)

[Carly]

Thank-you so much for the advice Joey is a bit of a challenge but I do the best that I can to make sure that he wears his aids. Joey is in preschool now at a regular preschool and also a class for the deaf and hard of hearing we feel that he is benefiting from attending both classes.

[DebCny]

Hi Carly =) Nice to meet you - and thanks for adding me as a "friend" on here.

Joey is absolutely adroable. When my son, AC, was that age... he had curly hair like that too.. *sigh* memories... =)

My son was 4 when he started wearing HA's... and, he actually took to them very well. I think, he just loved hearing things that before he had been (unknowingly) missing - so, he wanted to wear them.

Of course, there have been ups and downs with this over the years... and he has gone thru times when he didn't want to wear them. For school, it just has not ever been an option and he knows he has to wear them - but, I do let him go without them at home sometimes if he wants/needs a break from them. Like... sometimes it's okay for him to turn the TV up loud or the computer loud... rather than wear the HA's... or just go without them while he's doing homework or putzing around. Also, if he's running around outside. I think sometimes, he just wants a breakfrom them... and that is understandable.

For the most part, he has them on, though... We think of it just like part of his "getting dressed" in the morning... it's just another thing he puts on.

There was one time when he started insisting he didn't need to wear his HA's, and that he could hear "just fine with out them!". He was about 8. I said to him, "Oh really? what am I saying now?" (and I covered my mouth with my hand and whispered something - knowing he could not hear whispers at all without his HA's) - and when he said, "what?"... I said, "exactly". I guess, that was a little mean... but, it proved the point, that he could not hear "just fine" without them.

Joey is still little... so, I would go with giving him some options when you can... but, also making a big deal about pointing out things he CAN hear with them on... so he will not want to miss out on hearing things, and will want to wear them.

debcny
http://hearmehearmenot.wordpress.com

[Karen Putz]

Carly, that's a valuable lesson there-- always listen to your instincts! Will Joey be starting preschool soon?